Why is it the only time things work out the way you think they will is when it's something unfavorable? Every time you hope or think something good can or will work out it doesn’t but if you can envision something bad or unpleasant it always seems to come to fruition. Case in point: Delaware. I was sure everything here would be just like everywhere else I had been so there was no reason to stop. I hadn’t been here before though so I guess something in me thought maybe this place could be different. There could be something here that would be worthwhile to see. But no, of course there wasn’t. It was exactly like all those other places, just like I expected. And despite the fact I knew things probably weren’t going to be different I couldn’t hide my disappointment. I mean, why is it that your greatest expectations never seem to happen? Like Mary marching out of that building and jumping into my arms. Or Steph deciding to transfer colleges. Or Danielle seeing me as more than a little brother. Danielle…I hadn’t thought about her in years. She and I had worked at the grocery store when I still in high school and she was in her mid 20’s. We had similar personalities and always got along great despite the fact that I was a definitely a kid and she was definitely a woman. When she went off to the military we sent letters back and fort
all the time. It’s the only time I ever looked forward to getting the mail. I never thought something with us would work out. Much as I hated to admit it I knew she thought of me like a little brother and figured she’d end up getting married and pregnant long before she could ever think of me as anything else. But I had hope. I thought maybe one day she might be able to see me as something more. But no, of course she didn’t. Things worked out exactly the way I thought they would. She never saw me as anything more than her kid brother and wound up getting married not long after she got back from duty just like I thought she would.
I didn’t even want to think about any of that because I had to focus on driving since the weather helpfully went from grey and wet to grey and downpour. The climate variety you get in this region of the country really is unparalleled. I couldn’t help but to dwell on how only the unpleasant expectations seemed to work out though. There had to be a reason Delaware was exactly what I thought it would be. There had to be a reason Danielle ended up with the first dude she hooked up with after getting out of the military. There was a reason only your worst expectations came true, wasn’t there? Maybe it didn’t matter. Whatever my expectations, it was long over with Danielle just like it was with Mary but there was still time to change things with Steph which made any expectations irrelevant. It was all going to be fine. It was all going to be okay. Unfortunately I had a hell of a time convincing people that was the case, especially my father. I guess my sisters had talked to him because he