a part-time girlfriend and living in an apartment that was crappy enough to be cheap but too crappy to be worth it wasn’t exactly what I had envisioned for myself at this point in my life. I mean sure, I had a steady job that had room for advancement. I met a girl and started dating her. I got to know several people that became good friends of mine. I went out and just enjoyed the people, places and things that made LA such a unique and exciting place. But that wasn’t why I moved out here. I don’t remember exactly when, but at some point it became fairly evident that I wasn’t going to accomplish what I wanted and that fact weighed down on me. Eventually I felt like I needed to move on and do something else even though I had no idea what. I just wanted to hit the road and go somewhere. And at this point, I didn’t even care where. I was hesitant though because while I may have hated the city at first, LA had actually grown on me. The fact is, nobody here talks about what they’re actually doing. It’s all about what they want to do, or what they can do, or what they will do. It’s all about what they’re going to do and you could never escape that mentality, no matter where you went or what you were doing or who you were talking to. The whole concept made me smile and cringe at the same time./
In LA success is always just around the corner. Everyday could be the day somebody notices you and decides to make you a star. Everyday could be the day someone sees your stuff and decides you have what it takes. I had thought about moving out here since I was in high school, even though at the time I had no idea what I’d do here or even why I wanted to come so badly. But it didn’t matter to me and it didn’t matter to everyone else who moves out here. LA was where the action was, in more ways than one. They made dreams here, after all. The studios, the beaches, the egos…all of it came together to form a mentality that made people believe in their dreams and that they could accomplish just about anything. It was so big that there were people who were making a living off people who were chasing their dreams and it wasn’t a bad living, considering how many businesses offered expensive headshots, how many agents performed costly coverage and how many pricy acting classes were readily available. The only tricky part was in figuring out which places were legit and which were scams because there were plenty of both. Evidently it had been like this forever since I remember going into rooms at talent agencies that had boxes completely filled with thousands of old resumes and headshots from people who had submitted themselves over the years and were no longer active. They were The Boxes of Broken Dreams. I had to wonder what happened to people who came out here and realized they weren’t going to be able to do what they wanted to do. Did it ruin them? Did it give them a sense of peace? Did it drive them to do something they never would have done otherwise?